3 Main Things You Need to Know About Couples Therapy
There are so many misconceptions about therapy in general but then when you start getting into couples therapy, I think it’s even worse. If you think back to movies like Couples Therapy and Hope Springs, there are things that happen in couples therapy that make you wonder if it’s more helpful or detrimental to relationships! I would like to preface this article by saying that what I state pertains to couples therapy at Bright Side Family Therapy. There are so many different ways to work with couples, not that any are better or worse…they are just different. These are things you should know prior to coming to couples therapy here with me…
1. It is brief in nature…it is NOT a commitment to be in therapy for years!
There are many different ways that therapists work…some are long-term and some are what are considered “brief” in nature. The type of therapist that I am trained as is called a Solution Focused Brief Therapist. In very simple terms, this means that we will focus on the end goal first. What is it that you want out of therapy? What will be different when you and your partner have reached your desired goals? By discussing these details in extreme detail, a few things will begin to happen…A) you will begin to realize that there are many ways that these things are already happening, B) you will begin to remember the things you did in the past that helped to create the type of relationship you wanted, and C) you will realize that this desired outcome that you both want is much more attainable than you did when you first arrived at your session. In working this way, you will more than likely see results quicker than expected and for this reason, the couples that I see typically come for an average of only 4-6 sessions before they feel that they are able to move forward on their own without any outside help.
2. It is not only for couples who are on the brink of separation.
Back to misconceptions…there is definitely one out there that you only go to therapy as a last resort. Why would anyone want to pay money or waste their time unless things have reached the very worst? The thing is that therapy can help every person no matter what stage of life you are in. When considering a romantic relationship (whether that be when dating, engaged, or married), there are always things that can be improved. There are always things that it can be helpful to talk about and work on together. It brings the couple closer to have the opportunity to share about these things that you might not know how to bring up on the average night at home. So, if there is something I want to get across it’s that couples therapy is for ANY couple who would like to see growth in their relationship. That is what I am trained to do and what I love to do…bring you and your partner closer together no matter what stage you are at in your relationship.
3. It is productive and will leave you feeling hopeful about your relationship.
Let’s be honest…when we feel like our relationship is off track and totally headed in the wrong direction, what is it we really want? Relief. Hope. Closeness with our partner again. We want someone to tell us we are going to be okay and we want to feel more hopeful about our situation, whatever it may be. This is what therapy does. It helps to weed out all the crap that we tend to focus on day to day and realize that there is so much more to our relationship than arguing or division. We realize that we actually do have things in common and there are reasons, REAL REASONS, why we are together! And along with all this greatness, we also come up with a few (let’s not move too fast) practical tactics that will continue to help our relationships to grow closer. So, if this is something that you think you would like…some hope mixed in with a few practical tactics that will help your relationship…I dare you to schedule a session! And that’s just in our first session! ;-)